The Pros And Cons Of Using A Surrogate To Start A Family

If you have been having trouble getting pregnant and have tried everything from eating foods that increase sperm count to trying to conceive at certain times of the month but nothing’s working then you need to look into your options. If it turns out that you have fertility issues then you can either try IVF treatments, adoption, or even finding a surrogate mother. The last option is a bit controversial but is often the best choice for those having problems. 

IVF doesn’t always work if you have severe infertility issues. Adoption can be a lengthy process. Surrogacy is complex, but you are generally more in control and the wait time is usually only as long as the pregnancy lasts after matching the right qualifications for surrogacy. In this article, we will go over the pros and cons so you can decide for yourself if surrogacy is the best option for you. 



Surrogacy is the option that offers the best chance of success. IVF is tricky because some of the issues that are preventing you from getting pregnant can also affect your ability to get treatments. This only leaves the options of adoption and surrogacy. 

Adoption is also tricky as you may have a certain set of criteria for what you want in a child and the wait could be years before you find the right match. Not only that, but some people are determined to maintain their genetic line and are not going to ever adopt. With surrogacy, all you need is a willing mother to carry the child to term that is healthy enough for IVF. You also will have your DNA passed on through this route. 

Same-sex couples are not eligible for IVF and some adoption agencies are not willing to work with them. This often leaves surrogacy as the only option available to raise a family of their own. 

An unexpected benefit is getting to know the birth mother which is often not an option when adopting. When you know the surrogate mother it is easier to make some connections with the baby. Knowing the circumstances around their birth is also a big factor. Not knowing the circumstances around why the mother needed to put a child up for adoption can be quite distressing. 


There are some downsides to using a surrogate of course. One big one is how long the process can take. Even if you’re able to find a match with a mother quickly, there is the possibility that the IVF treatments take a few months to work. IVF is rarely a one-time treatment and usually takes several appointments before a viable embryo is formed. 

The legal aspects of surrogacy can scare some people away which can make it difficult to find a willing mother. Although it’s rare, there is the possibility that after carrying a baby to term the birth mother is reluctant to part with the baby which will involve a lengthy court process. 

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